The Day After

It's rare for me to not be able to find words to express my feelings.

But, it happens.

Like many of you I spent a night of worrying and crying more than sleeping.

But sleep came, finally, and was welcomed.

When I woke up all I wanted to do was pull the covers over my head and hope against hope that our dreams had not been dashed.

That maybe last night was a dream of the worst kind.

And maybe I could just go back to sleep.

Have a do-over with a different outcome.

Like you, my heart is broken.

Like many of you, the tears don't seem to have an end.

So. 

Today I'm going to allow myself to wallow in my sadness. 

I will cry. I will cuss. 

I will take my camera and take pictures of pretty things.

I will read Facebook to check on my friends.

I will post poems that say what's in my heart.

I will post art that speaks to me.

And I will write.

And tomorrow?

Tomorrow, I hope the tears will have found their end.

And I will start thinking about "what next?"

Today, I'm having a hard time deciding what shoes to put on, so not a day of decisions.

Not even a day for thinking.

Today is a day of emotion and feelings, that's all, I'm afraid, I'm capable of.

And I'm sending out a little bit of love to each of you.

And I'm remembering some of the old posters I had hanging on the walls of my very first apartment.

A lot of you had the same posters - remember?

The peace and love posters?

Wish I still had them.